Getting Back on Track. Again.

Overall, I have a lot to be proud of. After experiencing weight gain at record speed at the end of 2006, I finally was able to see some kind of improvement. Last spring, I lost 10 lbs, and this spring another 10-15lbs. But this summer came another lightning-speed weight gain of 10 lbs in the last 2 months. I cant help but feel disgusted with myself, shoveling more and more food into my mouth with no regard, feeling more and more full and sluggish, but not being able to stop.

I've had such great luck with different weight loss methods... anything from diet pills, to the more honest methods of weight watchers, calorie counting, vegetarian, raw diets, personal training, tae bo, you name it... I've done it. And if I stick to it, anything works. I guess the real problems lie in the fact that I can do a short-term program, but the long-term.... Well, that's more complicated.

I've never really been addicted to anything in my life.... cigarettes, alcohol, I could take 'em or leave 'em. Drugs? not a fan. But food, well.... can you consider that an addiction? Something that you need to live? I mean, I can't just NOT eat, or stay away from people who eat, or places that have food! But.... I have never acted with such disregard as when I'm shoveling pizza into my mouth. I have eaten so much to the point that my system is so polluted, I feel physically sick. I mean, wake up the next morning feeling drained and achy as if I have the flu.

So I'm back to calorie counting as of yesterday. It's keeping me in check (so far), and I have been feeling better. I know it will work if I stick to it, and those 10 lbs will come back off, maybe more. But how do I maintain it? How do I kick my addiction and tell myself that I don't NEED 3 slices of pizza? I don't NEED half a bag of potato chips to live....?